I consider myself an adult, and have for a very long time. But in my mind, there's this difference between being an adult and being a grownup. And while so far I've quite enjoyed most of my adult life, the path I've taken hasn't really lent itself to feeling grown up. There are an awful lot of adults like me out there who don't fit the grownup mold, but it's a mold that was reinforced in my childhood by my parents and by most of my friends' parents and by my primary leaders and by the majority of the grownups I knew, and it's hard to get past childhood impressions.The grownup mold entails such things as marriage and children, home purchases, car purchases, full-time 9-5 jobs, garages, lawn care, taxes, home repair, and so on. My inability to fit myself into the grownup mold is only partly because I'm single - I have friends my age and older who are also single and still living at least part of the prototypical grownup life. It's more my status as a perpetual student, which involves self-directed work, unsteady paid employment, lots of IKEA furniture, roommates, rent, and help from parents, right up through the ripe old age of 30.
I don't mind not being a grownup yet. In fact, for all their appearance of fitting the mold, my married, house-buying, childraising peers seem to young to be grownups too, and it's hard for me to believe that they're actually the real thing. Because the other part of the grownup mold, that prototype that was reinforced by my childhood, is that grownups are older than I am. Those grownup my-age friends that I have? They're just pretending until they (we) really grow up.
But I think what must happen is that you grow into grownupness gradually. And recently I finally found myself making a major step into grownuphood. No, I'm not talking about my official post-graduation job (which, incidentally, I officially accepted this evening), with a real income and real responsibilities. I'm talking about this:
Not that long ago I made a trip to Home Depot and purchased a 15-foot orange outdoor extension cord. I needed it so that I could vacuum the Jin hair out of my car. And when I went to use it for the first time, I thought, I own an orange outdoor extension cord, and this made me feel suddenly and surprisingly very grown up.
See, other than jobs and spouses and houses and kids, there are certain small possessions that only grownups have. Apparently I consider orange outdoor extension cords to be one of these things because coming into this possession made me feel grown up in a way that, oddly, acquiring the vacuum I hooked it up to, the car to which I needed to extend the vacuum, and the dog whose hair necessitated both the extending and the vacuuming, never did.
Who knew that this was all I needed?
5 comments:
Incidentally, was it at WCC?!?
That is really interesting that the orange extension cord made you feel grown up. (I have a brown one, and it´s not the official, grown up one, so I´m ok). I wonder what other small things make us feel grown up.
When I pull out my screw drivers to fix something in my apartment, I feel pretty grown up. Maybe it´s tool like things. (I think of extension cords as tool like things)Or maybe it´s because I know how to fix some basic things... (very basic)
... and what´s the real job? Inquiring minds want to know!
Wow, imagine how grownup you'd feel with a shop vac. :-)
Congratulations on your new job!!
I bought a vacuum a few months ago, and I was walking out of Costco with it and had the same thought, "wow, suddenly I'm a grown-up who takes care of things like buying vacuums" (or orange extension cords :). I also had that thought when I recently bought a hot glue gun. I'd never had one before because my mom, or my grown-up married sister had funny. It is interesting the small moments like this that just hit and you realize.....you're responsible haha.
Congrats on the job and the grownup purchase. :)
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