Long, Dark Winter of the Soul

Two tragedies befell me recently.

I need to preface my description of these tragedies by saying that Michigan is a horrid place to be a runner in the wintertime. In fact, I won't lie. One of the main reasons I experienced so much trepidation about moving to the midwest was that I feared the winters as a runner, not just because I hate the cold (and I do, let's make that clear). And in some ways, my fears were completely well-founded. It's not just that Michigan mornings are dark and bitterly cold and windy, it is that the sidewalks and roads spend a good part of five months or so covered with snow or ice or slush or some combination of the three, and during that time running outdoors is not just unpleasant, it is more or less impossible.

So what living in Michigan taught me during that very first winter was how to be a treadmill runner. I had to transition in slowly - a mile here, two miles there - but eventually I got to the point where I could actually sort of enjoy running on the treadmill. I don't run with music outdoors, and so sometimes it's fun to plug myself into my iPod, get up some speed, and lose myself in the workout instead of the surroundings. I mean, I always, always will take running outdoors (in 60-degree, windless, sunny weather) to running indoors, but I can handle the winters as a human and as a runner.

Tragedy #1 was when my iPod shuffle was killed suddenly and prematurely. It was entirely accidental, but the accident was also entirely my fault and I bear the full burden of the responsibility for sending it through the wash and ending its life. I think I'd had it for less than a year, and I was devastated. Okay, maybe not so much devastated as made at myself, since I had been carefully rebuilding my reputation for being careless with my material possessions (though I need to point out that one of the two lost cameras was found several months later, and two of the car accidents were not my fault). Another strike against me.

Now I could have handled the loss of the iPod shuffle. And I did handle it for a few weeks. I have managed to keep my regular iPod for nearly three years without losing or destroying it (and yes, I originally bought this iPod to replace my first iPod which, yes again, I lost, but it was sort of Eric's fault that time). It's clunky and inconvenient, and doesn't clip nicely to my shorts, but it produces music and that's all I really need. And shuffle aren't that expensive. Someday in the not-too-distant future I will have an income and $49 won't be too much to shell out for a new one.

But then the even more devastating Tragedy #2 struck this morning. Actually, it struck last night, but I only discovered it this morning. I got up like I usually do and, being a morning runner, made my way through the cold and wind and light snowfall to the fitness center on the other side of the parking lot, only to find all the lights off and a sign from the management on the door stating that the fitness center would be closed until further notice. Once I got over my dismay at having my schedule disrupted, I started to wonder what "until further notice" might mean - a few hours, a few days? Maybe (gulp) a few weeks?

So a little later in the day I went to the office to find out and was told that, no, "until further notice" actually meant "probably about 90 days."

"You're kidding!" I said. I didn't want to sound like an obsessed runner who will die without access to exercise facilities because I don't think I'm obsessive. Okay, not too obsessive. But I am sure that I am not the only one in my apartment complex who feels that if a fitness center must be closed for three months, the beginning of winter in Michigan is pretty much the worst time of year to do it.* It's true that the North Campus Recreation Building is only a few miles away. It is also true, however, that it doesn't open until 7 in the morning, that I have to pay for parking, that there are not enough treadmills for the users, that there is a 30-minute time limit on the treadmills if people are waiting to use them, that it's really poorly ventilated, and that it's just a crummy alternative all the way around.

I hate to be melodramatic, and most of my readers, Brady excepted, are not going to really understand why I am so worked up about this. But when I run almost every single day, just as part of the routine, to have my options sucked away suddenly and without warning for three whole months is not just an annoyance, it's a disruption of my life pattern.

I have heard tell that the apartment complex down the street may have a fitness room and a key that never gets used in possession of people I know. If this is true and possible then it is the one glimmer of hope in this whole, sudden, unexpected mess, but right now I just have yet one more reason to despise this time of year. I think maybe I should move to Texas.

Okay, rant over.



*They actually do have a sort of good excuse. There was a fire in the fitness center last night. It didn't cause extensive damage, but since they were planning on renovating the fitness center in January anyway they decided to just push through the funding and do it now. Except that means they were still planning on closing the fitness center down right at the time when the most people would be using it....